Hang-Ups & Hardships. . .

[The Papua Expedition ~ Day 32]

We’ve reached the far eastern tip of the island of Sumbawa, one of the lengthiest islands I’ll cross on my way east.

Over the course of this journey, I’ve been met with the constant reminder that I don’t know this country as well as I thought. This land and the way things work is (almost) completely foreign to me after spending the last three years of my life just a few hundred kilometers west of here. It’s frustrating, to say the least.

Our latest battle has been the ferry system. What seems should be a fairly straight-forward and orderly system of inter-island travel is, in fact, far from it. So confusing, actually, it has discouraged my reliance on it for the rest of the way.

We are stuck in Bima, the island’s largest city, for the next five days while we wait out ‘poor sea conditions’. This is what I’ve been told anyway, from ferry operators, despite meanwhile being offered several trips on expensive private (and much smaller) charter boats.

We’ve luckily found a hotel that makes me feel like I’m staying in the Hilton, especially after a month of difficult assimilation to local living standards in village after village.

I don’t want that to make me sound like I’m complaining about what I’ve chosen to put myself through, because I’m not. After all, for me, it’s a choice to be here. For so many others we’ve met on our walk, this is life. I have felt nothing but truly humbled.

Still, I would be lying to say that all the frustrations — added up — haven’t made me feel like quitting. At several points, I have tried to make excuses for myself — the ferry system being the latest. I’ve thought about back-tracking to Bali for a month of recalibration. After all, this is my first attempt at true expedition and it is far from an easy one.

It’s not like we are machete-ing our way through jungle growth, but at times, I wish we were. Or, at least, further isolated from people — which have been the cause of most of the frustration to this point. Old feelings of distrust have resurfaced and forced me to question the very purpose of this challenge. I thought being at the mercy of others would foster closer relationships, but it has done the furthest thing from it to this point.

Despite all of it, we’ve made the decision to push on. On the 12th, we’ll head to the island of Flores, with much anticipation.

As we tread east, the stares have gotten longer and less welcoming. Not in an inhospitable way, but in shock. Our interpretation of our encounters, too, has become more shocking. Admittedly, there is a lot more on record about Flores. It’s not as much of an unknown as Sumbawa was to us. This will be a good thing.

— Adam

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